The following article is the sole opinion of Arthur Helms. ZWN and it's
affiliates do not influence, endorse nor are accountable for Mr. Helms
Now, I don’t
usually talk shop at dinner, but his passion for the subject was infectious
and, on condition of anonymity for both Joe and the park, described
the security scenarios and measures in great detail.
Joe’s descriptions took the better part of the night. He told
me about certain attractions and buildings they had covertly converted
into “safe houses”, with concealed steel shutters for the
doors and hidden caches of food, weapons and medical supplies designed
to keep hundreds of people fed, sheltered and safe for weeks if needed.
The park’s hotels had received similar, nearly invisible modifications
as well. Joe sent several members of his own security and medical staffs
to non-publicized training classes specifically designed against the
threat of Necro-Mortosis. Coursework ranged from leadership and crowd
control all the way up to hard-core nullification. These specially-trained
members of the staff are scheduled in such a way as to make sure there
are always enough of them in the park during any operational hour.
Compare Joe’s preparations for a family-themed amusement park
with that of a cruise ship like, say, the ill-fated Horizon
Dawn. If an outbreak were to occur in a family-themed amusement
park, there would be a multitude of places to hide and many exits to
channel people away from the threat. Most of these parks have professional
security forces on site, or at the very least a hotline to local police
and emergency services. By contrast an enclosed, captive environment
such as a cruise ship, airplane or even remote resorts in rugged areas
such as ski lodges
can, and have, turned into literal Necro-Mortosis incubators due to
poor or non-existent planning or just plain panic.
Now, I’m not saying anything that most of you don’t know
already. The difference is, I am actually saying it, not merely thinking
it. The plague is real, and it is growing. Joe’s park could end
up being THE hot vacation destination for families around the country
if they would only advertise such arrangements for the safety of their
guests. Joe and his forward-thinking employers are tight-lipped about
the whole thing, and it’s not because they’re afraid the
dead may find out; they’re afraid the living will.
We don’t want to think about the dead, Necro-Mortosis or the 'Z'
word. Not when we vacation or put ourselves into an airplane flying
at 30,000 feet above the ground. I’m sure the plague was the last
thing on the minds of the passengers of the Horizon Dawn. But if a family-themed
fun park, populated with costumed mascots, over-priced potato-patch
fries and all things good has seen fit to prepare for the worst while
hoping for the best, shouldn’t we expect the same thing from our
transportation industry? No one wants to think about their plane crashing
or their luxury liner sinking under the weight of the 24 hour buffet,
but these things do happen. These companies instruct their passengers
on what to do if these events occur based on safety plans designed by
professionals and overseen, even legislated, by government. These companies
need to develop comprehensive, professional and monitored plans of action
in the event of a Necro-Mortosis outbreak. Further, they need to instruct
their passengers and customers on these plans openly and honestly.
Most companies will tell you off the record that they can’t advertise
any plans they’ve developed, or systems they have implimented.
To do so would become a marketing nightmare, with the fear that potential
customers would quickly and subconsciously link the plague with the
company name. Making plans and preparations in the corporate world is
a double-edged sword. We all would like to think that corporations and
government are working to keep us safe from the plague. And yet, at
the same time we don’t really want to discuss it as a possibility
here in the good ‘ole U.S. of A. We can’t have it both ways.
We need companies like Joe’s theme park to come out into the light
and openly discuss the precautions they’ve taken, and we need
corporations that deal in the captive transport of hundreds per trip
to make their own regulated and investigated plans for dealing with
an outbreak en route. Personally, I can tell you that the first airline
to come out with a logical, rational and executable 'necro outbreak'
plan will become my airline of choice. And I don’t think I need
to tell you where I’ll be vacationing this summer.
Arthur Helms is a syndicated columnist who has dealt with a host of
social and political issues. His previous syndicated column, “Logic,
Please?” offered commentary on a host of world-view issues as
seen through the cold yet bright light of plain logic, demonstrated
fact and simple common sense.
the academic and political elite often dismissed his commentary as “too
simplistic” for our complicated times, his books of collected
columns and hundreds of national speaking engagements each year attest
to his connection to a readership yearning for simple answers to complex
issues. Helms recently ended his syndicated column to sign on exclusively
with Zombie World News, providing a fresh, logical,
plain-English view of the plague and to bring some common sense to what
many perceive to be a senseless situation.
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