Ich Bin Ein Zombie?
- Part I

Posted 6/8/08

Disclaimer: The following article is the sole opinion of Arthur Helms. ZWN and it's affiliates do not influence, endorse nor are accountable for Mr. Helms opinions. Bookmark and Share

The people of Hannover, Germany have my congratulations for dodging the Mortosis bullet. Their authorities acted quickly and properly in their investigation and containment of what could have become a serious outbreak. No one wants outbreak incidents to occur anywhere in the world, but when they do occur it is our duty to learn from them, depriving the virus of one of its most lethal weapons; fear of the unknown. The Hanover incident brings to light two very different though equally important facets of Necro-Mortosis, facets we would do well to study and control.

First, we need to control our fear at the virus and its reanimates. Silke Koch, the first on-record survivor of an attack by a reanimate where an exchange of bodily fluids was almost guaranteed, did what anyone trained as a nurse would do; she rushed to the aid of a man that seemed to be in need. Witnesses said that even before she approached the Mortosis victim, Eugene Becker, he exhibited classic signs of infection. Helmut Schneider, another witness and the boyfriend of Ms. Koch, acted as many men would have done when seeing their significant others being attacked by rushing in to help her with a group of onlookers in tow. Under normal circumstances, the responses of these normal, everyday people are entirely understandable, save perhaps for the viciousness of the defense of Ms. Koch offered by her boyfriend and gaggle of a crowd.

Had this been a normal situation, replacing the mortosis victim with a living man that was doing harm to another, Mr. Schneider and the rest of the group’s response to the attack on Ms. Koch could well have been prosecuted depending on how badly they hurt the assailant, even though he had “started it”. Mr. Schneider was in fact held on assault charges while authorities determined whether Mr. Becker was indeed infected. Mr. Schneider claimed that he felt the assailant was a reanimate before Ms. Koch even approached him. Luckily for the concerns of Mr. Schneider’s freedom, the assailant was a reanimate since reports of the defense offered by Mr. Schneider went well-past what is acceptable under German law as “self-defense”.

Ms. Koch reacted as a caring human being, seeking to help another with her medical training and upholding the fine qualities and selfless natures of her profession we as a society often take for granted regardless of the thought that her prospective patient may in fact be infected with Necro-Mortosis. Mr. Schneider reacted in the defense of his lady-love, a trait that many women would never admit to admiring but do so anyway. The worrisome part about his role in all this comes not from that he defended Ms. Koch, but that he chose to move the act from defense to assault. From what little information I’ve obtained, the light of logic sheds thusly; Ms. Koch would have reacted in the same manner whether the prospective patient was infected or not. Sadly, it also seems the same could be said for Mr. Schneider. Eugene Beck would have been just as savagely beaten by Helmut Schneider had he been a hooligan accosting Ms. Koch in a park or a Mortosis victim in an airport. Schneider claims he thought Mr. Beck was a reanimate, yet his anger at him for attacking Ms. Koch drove him to continue hand-to-hand combat even after he and the group managed to separate Mr. Beck and Ms. Koch.

No single health care professional is equipped to deal with an unfettered reanimate in the field without first subduing or otherwise confining them. Germany isn’t some Third World nation, and I’m sure that by now every health care professional in the industrial world has been through more than one seminar and training class on how to deal with Necro-Mortosis and reanimates. Ms. Koch used her training in conjunction with her heart, instead of her head. Mr. Schneider used his desire to prove himself a worthy protector to justify a vicious response, prolonging the attack instead of removing Ms. Koch from the situation immediately and reporting it to the authorities. In doing this, he exposed himself and the rest of the onlookers to infection themselves. Had he been thinking, he would have better spent his time removing Ms. Koch and seeking medical attention for her instead of wasting precious time savaging Mr. Beck.

The key here is that everyone involved suspected Mr. Beck was infected BEFORE they approached him. Even with these suspicions, they chose to approach him anyway without so much as a call to airport security. Dear Reader, you simply can’t do this. Had they reported sighting Mr. Beck and his reanimate-like behavior, Ms. Koch wouldn’t have been attacked and possibly infected and Mr. Schneider and the others wouldn’t have exposed themselves to the same risk. This group wasn’t cornered by a reanimate, they had plenty of room to escape without having to come into contact with the reanimate. Their lives weren’t in danger until they made the conscious decision to put themselves within reach of a reanimate. In short, all involved thought with their hearts, their oaths and their testosterone instead of using the greatest weapon we have against the plague, a weapon the dead don’t possess; think with your head.

Dealing with a reanimate on the hoof requires dispassion, logic and clear thinking. Emotional responses to a “live-fire” reanimate encounter can only end in disaster. Reports indicate Mr. Beck was somewhat “freshly turned”, meaning that many of his bodily fluids would have still been thin enough to leave the body in the traditional manner of a street fight such as the one Mr. Schneider administered and create a serious infection hazard for anyone within range of an errant drop of blood. We can’t fight Mortosis and destroy reanimates as if we were in a soccer riot. Unless you’re willing to be properly trained and equipped to deal with a suspected reanimate, or escape simply isn’t an option, your first duties to yourselves and the world at large is to get away, get safe and get help. We have to stop trying to fight the plague and the undead with our hearts. Compassion, caring and testosterone must give way to logic and common sense when Necro-Mortosis infection is suspected. Many outbreaks have their start with family and friends of the reanimate and even medical and emergency service workers trying to help them only to become infected themselves because they allowed their emotions to interfere with their training and good old fashioned common sense.

Next time, we’ll look at the regulations, or rather the lack thereof, concerning the world’s most dangerous cargo and what needs to be done to secure it. Until then, Dear Reader, I’ll leave you with the words of one of the most reviled men in history. Joseph Stalin once said, “One death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.” Right now, the comparative death toll from Necro-Mortosis the world over is a tragedy. But if we continue to handle these small, individual tragedies with our hearts, we could all find ourselves part of the statistic.


Related report:
Mortosis incident in Hannover? Posted: 4th, May. 2008
'John Doe' identified in Hannover attack Posted: 8th, May. 2008
Victim released from hospital Posted: 10th, May. 2008
Hannover attack - airport searched Posted: 17th, May. 2008
Airport reopens - quarantine lifted Posted: 2nd, June. 2008

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Arthur Helms is a syndicated columnist who has dealt with a host of social and political issues. His previous syndicated column, “Logic, Please?” offered commentary on a host of world-view issues as seen through the cold yet bright light of plain logic, demonstrated fact and simple common sense.

While the academic and political elite often dismissed his commentary as “too simplistic” for our complicated times, his books of collected columns and hundreds of national speaking engagements each year attest to his connection to a readership yearning for simple answers to complex issues. Helms recently ended his syndicated column to sign on exclusively with Zombie World News, providing a fresh, logical,
plain-English view of the plague and to bring some common sense to what many perceive to be a senseless situation.

Have an opinion about this article? Respond to:
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